I feel balancing our Male and Female energies is about understanding the deeper core energies that shaped us.
It is about understanding how our mother and father ‘shaped’ us with their desires for themselves when we were born. When we have children, we always hope they will be better versions of ourselves which is based on our own past experience of life. We understand what part of our past we didn’t like, what we liked as well the failure we felt from what we felt we did not achieve. It is also common we wish about the future, for better lives with more happiness, joy and abundance. When we have kids, we want all that we liked for them, and all that we didn’t like not for them, as well to push them to be more then we were. This is every parents motivation when they have children, to create new life and that child will be better than them and better able to survive. Love is always there at base, even if it is not apparent.
So what about a rapist that gets a woman (married or not married) pregnant? Surely, he did not make life with the thought of love, right? But actually he did, but it is harder to see. He rapes because he is trying to heal his wounded past probably from not getting his mother’s attention (not enough love) or wrong kind of attention from his mother (violence or sexual abuse). So by raping, he is trying to heal the hate he has by expressing himself in the external world. He is mostly doing this healing unconsciously; not knowing that this is what he is trying to do. To be clear, this way will never heal the rage he has against his mother, it will only perpetuate it. The way heal it is from within, from self-introspection and awareness of one’s one energetic pattern that is causing one to behave this way ‘unconsciously’. Then if he were a father and hadn’t yet healed this hatred for the mother, if he had girls he would hate them and might do incest to them. If he couldn’t do that, say if he only had boys, he would be the type to go out and rape women outside the house to get out his hatred. From his own wife, maybe he couldn’t do that if his wife was reminded him of his sister whom he connected to when growing, so he felt love for the sister (even he may have had incest with her when young). So in this kind of pattern he loved his wife and only raped women that looked like this mother. Now to go another generation back, we look at his mother and why she couldn’t give love to him, and it is likely she was raped by a man, maybe because her mother could not protect her. Then when she had kids she really wanted girls, because she wanted to protect girls, and then when she had a boy, she rejected that boy like projecting her hatred of men onto the body. And what do you know, this woman had 2 girls and one boy. And so the patterns and wounding gets passed down through the generations, until we can recognize them and break the chain. You can take the above example and apply it any deep seated habit energy in yourself you are trying to heal and then see what are the roots of it which will come from your own family energy dynamics of mother, father, grandparents and siblings.
Now if the rapist were to look inside and see how these things and energies were inherited, from unresolved wounds in his parents past (it keeps going back generation after generation) then he could see this own pattern in himself, and then be ‘able to let it go’ and heal it and break the chain. Then he would no longer want to rape.
But understand these things: we inherit a role, it is programmed in our DNA, ½ of this program comes from the egg (female energy), ½ from the sperm (male energy). But also there is the soul, which is the spark of light of your true self, which actually chose those parents, to go into that body, because you needed the patterns of energy from those parents to move you forward in your evolution. They are unresolved things from prior past lives, not that what happened to you happened before, but what you experienced this lifetime, gives you the experience you need to evolve further ‘by healing them.’ So much of our life we get growing up is based on our relation to the male and female energy, which is the energy of life. The mother nurtures & gives life, the father protects the life, this is protective energy. The other aspect of mother and father is ‘sex’, or uniting physically with another person, so like finding love or the ‘soul mate’ quest, this is procreation energy. Thus most of our wounding comes from our energy pattern between our mother, our father and everything to do with nurturing, protecting and our experiences with sex. This wounding was part of our ‘soul-plan’ because we knew if we got those kind of ‘energy wounds’ and we could heal them, it would move us closer to the TRUE LOVE which is what we are really seeking (the internal soul-mate), which is the Love that made us and exists at everyone’s core in the inside. Our wounding is that which shields us from this core, by healing it, we reveal the Love that has always been there.
Women can have it especially difficult because of the male-dominated world we’ve had for a long time, so men have often used women to get out their pain simply because they can overpower them. Then the contrary of this is women then want a man to protect them to feel safe, which is what keeps women from self-empowerment or taking leading roles and becoming self-sovereign. Now I am not implying that women become the leaders over men and then take over the world, no! Rather it is about balance! That is what humanity is moving towards, a balance of male and female energies, which is based on love for each other, each appreciating what the opposite parts of us (male and female) gives to the whole. Each person is actually Male and Female on the inside, Love or God is actually not male or female, it is both mixed together, so God is a HIR. That is the spiritual understanding and importance of ‘marriage’, that when we balance our internal male and female energies, then we have found our true-soul mate or Love within and at that point we are in perfect position to find our external soul-mate, which will perfectly complement us in the outside world. Like being the perfect half of our energy. But most people do it in reverse they try to find their soul-mate in outside world, before they find their true soul-mate which is inside them. In this way they can never find love, because they are always chasing around in the outside world and it can’t be found there.
An important part of women’s healing today is realizing they can take the lead (they are not only nurturers needing protecting) and when they do it, it empowers their male energy, like it comes out of hiding. This balances their overall energy and with it fear of men reduces as well the desire to only bring love into the world. For each female that awakens and heals their past and balances their energy, they also balance the worlds energy, making it more positive. Females are needed greatly today; they are the peacemakers who can stop the wars that the male-dominated world of our past wanted and did create. Women must also realize they were part of creating this war world, by allowing their men to protect them, by being subservient or even aggressive to other women. You can see this war tendency which is instinctual as ‘survival of the strongest’ in any two strong male men. It is normal they will not talk to each other, because they are strong protectors and it is always about survival of the fittest and creating more children like themselves. It is My Way or the Highway, these strong men rarely see eye-to-eye and cooperate with each other. You see it in nature, where a Male lion will take over a family of lions by killing the Male in charge and the next thing he does is kill all the male children. Now this can also happen with women who have strong female dominant energy inside, they don’t like other females and when they feel one around that is stronger than themselves, then tend to want to kill them for the same reason.
Okay, so you can investigate these energy patterns, to see how they molded you, what were you given, not given, how did it affect you in life choices, with male / female friends. How did you interact with male / female energy? What kind of jobs you like, working with people, working by self, working in group of males or group of females? What kind of camaraderie do you have? Do you like to take the lead, shrink from the lead or like others to protect or nurture you? Keep asking questions like this to see what energies you need to heal and balance.
Ask you parents how they came up with your name and what aspirations they had for you when you were born. Ask each parent separately; ask about first and middle names. Also consider what you family surname means. You can use Google to look up meaning of names for both first and surnames. Your parents gave you a name, some was from their grandparents, as well there is simply a power itself in the name they give you, which is uniquely yours. For example, your first name may have come from your mother’s hope for you, which could be on surface simple like being an actress, but on another spiritual level that name has another meaning which the dictionaries can hint at. Your given name gives you hints about your past lives or your soul, which goes beyond the current lifetime.
Try to see what they wanted for you (or better what they wanted for themselves…). I just did this with my parents and it was eye opening, and really made me make more sense of who I was, of what they wanted me to be. This is the role we inherit, it is hard-wired into our body, it cannot be erased. But also that doesn’t mean this is Who we are. It is more like a framework, a starting point for this current life. The way to work with this framework, is to realize it is there, it was actually what we needed to perfectly manifest our best version of ourselves this lifetime. But that doesn’t mean you are only to enliven this role energetically and become it, no! We are also growing just like a baby, so it’s about integrating that past at same time we are having and adding to our experiences.
We have a spark of light as soul, which exists beyond the current lifetime, both before and after this one. The other thing to understand is what your soul wanted for this lifetime, what is your vision or mission of the future, what was it in your heart you wanted to do? By looking back at key events in your life (good and bad), you can see how you’ve been walking, what things you did that gave you joy (focus to brings these into your daily life as ‘your work’ to help others.) as well which things hurt you and need healing. By healing our wounds, we stop the epidemiology or passing pain between generations. When you were joyful with something, it means that was when you were in alignment with your vision. So it can also be helpful to ask your parents, when I was little, what did you think I was going to be, or what was I good at. These kinds of answers may surprise you. Also, consider any nicknames they gave you or that your friends gave you. This kind of investigation will help you to see your programmed aspect or role, as well your vision for the future (what you want to become, what you are working towards). When you know your old world vision or past (where you came from) and know your new world or vision (what you are moving towards), then you can realize you are not either of these, rather you are the traveler on this journey – you are the source of life and love itself! After you’ve found that love, then your future traveling will be much more enjoyable, as you spread your love around the world.
July 25, 2014
Note: While I have put my name upon this article, I realize it did not come from only me. What is in this article is an infusion of insight from many people, my grandparents, my parents, my brothers, sisters, my best friends, my guru, from two people’s book which I just read, from my meeting I went to last night. Thank you to everyone for helping me heal. I will still put my name on an article I write with a date stamp, but that is more a reference in my walking on this path for the future, it has nothing to do with ‘claiming ‘ownership’.