“There is a common pattern for people with low self-esteem that is particularly dangerous or limiting. It has to do with the reaction to success. Core self-doubt or previous failures can cause us to feel we do not deserve to be successful and if we are successful, then failure is inevitable and makes us fear we will lose it. In a successful happy phase, it is important to not fall into the trap of that pattern. If we do, we will definitely fail because the failure pattern running in the background eventually manifests itself and sabotages our success. When you are positive and have a mindset that everything that you are doing is working towards fulfilling your purpose in life and is beneficial, then you will see everything positively. You will even see what others may see as negative as being positive.” – Vivbala — Life is Binary
Reading Vivbala’s book was a synchronistic event for me. I had done some intensive self-inquiry and had dug deep and asked some essential questions in another post about awakening which I felt I needed to understand. I was open to receive the answers, but did not get a reply. Exactly at this time his book landed in my lap, and it gave me the answers to my questions. After that event, the synchronistic events started increasing. I wrote a review for his book because I liked it so much and just wanted as many people to read it as possible, seeing it’s importance to help other people awaken. I sent the author messages and in a little while then he contacted me.
He then shared that he had the insight that the first person who wrote a review was an important connection. In reply, I explained why I liked his book, how helpful it was for me and how I felt it could go viral and be important to help others. I told him I was promoting his book every way I could, because my main interest is to help others awaken and feel his book has high potential to do that. The last thing I mentioned was that the book would do better if it were edited, to clean up the typos and correct the grammar which would increase the clarity.
In the next reply, he said he was looking for an editor and suggested I was the one to do it. I replied that I would think about it. I am not sure, but I think he did not read my comment to them closely as they said thanks for accepting to do the editing, even before I had said yes! When he asked if I could do it, I was wavering because I had doubt that I had the capability to do it. Part of this doubt was because during my school days, English class was my least favorite; I got poor grades and did not learn basic grammar well. The other part was how much time it would take to do the task; I would have to give up something in my life to be able to get it done. Also, I felt my skills would limit by ability to do it in professional way. I thought it would take a year for me to become a good editor. I doubted myself so much that I wrote to a contact, looking for another way to edit the book by finding a professional editor from an established publishing house.
In the next days, all these things went through my mind with new possibilities, directions and synchronistic events happening and then I saw this in myself: I was sabotaging my chance for success due to self-doubt, just like the quote above. When I saw that in myself, then I realized I had to accept what was being offered to me from life and I wrote a positive message back that I accepted the task and would give it my best effort. That was just the beginning; it is now turning into an adventure into unknown dimensions that I never expected!
June 5, 2014